Entrance Fail.

25 02 2009

Yep. This happened. Best entrance to a show. EVER. We love you, Jenni.

Ahh NCCAF. The best 5 days in a long time.


NCCAF: Play Hard or Go Home.

20 02 2009


Yeah, we are a SEXY bunch

Yeah, we are a SEXY bunch

Yep. Made of BEES had their first NCCAF appearance last night. And they ROCKED the joint. (*Pictures coming soon). We wanted to take this opportunity to thank the DSI Comedy Theatre, the NC Comedy Arts staff, fans, and everyone who has been supporting this awesomely incredible festival. There are still 9 more shows TONIGHT and 7 more shows TOMORROW! Holy sh*t! That’s a lot of comedy.

So, if you are sad you missed the first 2 nights, don’t fret. Come check out shows tonight and tomorrow. Unless you are reading this on Sunday… or any day after that. Because it will be too late. 

But if you are reading this at a later time and you attended one of those shows, thank you. And man, that bit about the race cars and barbies? — GREAT BIT. Am I right?

I think I just blew my own mind. 

All for now.



19 02 2009

For the full effect of the title, sing the words in the style of Fiddler on the Roof’s “Tradition…Tradition!

Good morning, you beautiful humans,  you.  Zach here yet again, making a post before heading down to the North Carolina Comedy Arts Festival, where I’m performing in no less than 12 hours.  Eek, indeed.

Typically I’d be in class right now, learning about english or something-or-other.  But, the prof’s sick, so that leaves me with about 2.5 hours before my next class.

Bad news: It’s 2.5 hours.

Good news: It leaves me plenty of time to tell you about the audition I had this past Monday.

Friday I get a call from the talent agency I signed up with here in Richmond about two years ago.  This was the first time they had ever called.  Surprisingly, they wanted to send me to an audition for a viral video that a large credit card company was producing.  I won’t say the name of the company, for fear of litigation, but I will tell you that they ask you constantly what is in your wallet.

So I accept the audition, of course.  They tell me great, and send me the copy.  I open it up, and I’m reading for the role of “Large man”.  Now I’m okay with this, as I am un gran hombre.  So I look through the script, and apparently said Large man is supposed to enter wearing nothing but his undergarments, slippers, and a smile.  Then he makes a euphemistic poop joke, another joke about his skin being delicate, then vacates the scene.

I read it, and read it again.  “Alright,” I tell myself, “It’s not Shakespeare, but long as it pays.”

Monday rolls around, the day of the audition.  I get a little gussied up and head to the hotel where they’re doing the auditions for everyone.  Locating the room, I find that there’s only a couple of people there, all dressed smarter than me, and all looking very, very intense.

I approach one gentleman.  An Asian guy, taller than me, skinny, wearing a black button-down shirt, black slacks, a purple tie, and some very stylish glasses.  Smiling, I ask him if we’re supposed to wait out here in the hallway, or go in.  He scans me pretty noticeably, then says, in a very droll, hipster voice, “No.  We stay out here.”

Now I can handle the drollness, and I can handle the hipsterness.  But why in the world did he feel the need to look me over as if I’m competition for whatever role he was reading for?  I’m 5’7″, and a large, sexy hunk of a man.  He’s 5’11”, thin as a rail, and obviously up to date on whatever GQ is saying is fashionable these days.  Really doubt we’re up against each other, buddy.

In any case, I get called in.  Do the whole little how-do-you-do dance, get my slate taken, and we’re almost ready to begin.  Of course I do the thing that shouldn’t be done, and ask them how they want it read.  They tell me to just do I can with it.

So I do.  I do it twice, they thank me and send me on my merry way.  I thank them in return and head back out into the hallway.  The hipster dude’s still there, so being the friendly guy I am, I wish him a good audition.  He looks me over again, then just tilts his head up slightly in acknowledgment.

So thanks, hipster guy.  Thanks for reminding me why exactly I’m shifting away from the acting thing to focus on a teaching career and improvisation.  Hopefully I won’t deal with your type again.

Gah, actors.

The Bees + Animoto + NCCAF = YAY!

18 02 2009

[clearspring_widget title=”Animoto.com” wid=”46928cc51133af17″ pid=”499b8e9a0831c6e1″ width=”432″ height=”240″ domain=”widgets.clearspring.com”]

Yep, it’s almost here.

Beard no more

12 02 2009

Good morning, everybody.  Zach here, making my first post on this blog.  I have to say, it’s a new experience, as most of my blogging has been done in the early 2000s with LiveJournal.  Ahhh, LiveJournal, already a nostalgic part of my past.

Anyway, the main reason I’m posting on here is to inform you beautiful people that I’ve had to part ways with my beard, sadly.  

At least it didnt look like THIS GUYS.

At least it didn't look like THIS GUY'S.

I know, I know, it’s a horrible thing to hear, but it was for the best for both of us.  The beard (from henceforth now shall be called “Ezekiel“) was just getting out of hand.  Always wanting to go out, when really I wanted to stay in.  Asking me when I was going to settle down with one style and keep it that way, as Ezekiel was getting tired of having to constantly update his wardrobe.  And the itching…oh god, the itching.


So, Ezekiel is no more.  Now, I’m sporting a couple of hot sideburns, which I’ve dubbed Terence and Morton.  We’re getting along great, though Morton occasionally pipes up as to why Terence is a little longer.  Oh, Mort, that’s what happens when you’re on the left side of a person who’s right-handed, like Terence.  Them’s the breaks.

Anyway, thanks for visiting the site, and I hope to see you all at the North Carolina Comedy Arts Festival, February 19th-21st, in Chapel Hill.  Which is North Carolina (makes sense). 

And if you’re really upset over Ezekiel and I parting ways, don’t fret.  He’ll come around again.

We’re BACK!

27 01 2009
these bees are creepy AND awesome.

these bees are creepy AND awesome.

Hey fans. It’s 2009 and the BEES are back up and working. Check out the new layout of the site, watch some videos, do some bee bits, whatever!

We are WAY excited to be performing at the North Carolina Comedy Arts Festival coming up in February.

If you are anywhere near Carrboro, Raleigh, or Chapel Hill in February you BETTER come see our show because it’s going to be awesome. Check the “UPCOMING SHOWS” link for details.

It’s a new year. Awesome.