So, yeah, 4 months.
Sorry about that.
For what it’s worth, I’ve totally been thinking about updating this blog for the past month. Every time I logged on, I thought to myself, “Zach, maybe it’s time you went back, did a little blogging on MoB’s site.”
Then, what do you know, I’d go and get distracted by something. 8 times out of 10, it’d be Sushi Cat, a game on Yahoo! that is completely simple, and totally addictive. The objective is to drop your Sushi Cat from the top of the screen, making sure he accumulates as many tuna rolls as possible until he becomes positively huge.
Being a man who also enjoys copious amounts of food, I could relate. I found it my obligation…nay, my honor!…to aid that fat feline in his quest for sushi supremacy.
That’s what happened the first two months of the sabbatical.
In July, I told myself that MoB’s site desperately needed updating. It’d been two months since I last typed out my thoughts, leaving people with a blog entry that quite frankly, while making me sound awesome, also gave the notion that it was maybe my opus. I had just given my valedictorian speech as leaving the graduation ceremony, ready to move on to the next phase of my life.
I wasn’t, of course. I was still doing improv, making people laugh, having a grand old time.
So one night I sat down and fired the laptop up, the Yahoo! homepage appearing.
I was so close to blogging. And then I saw it.
Sushi Cat 2: The Honeymoon.
I then spent the next 2 hours maneuvering my corpulent cat through puzzles, dropping him amongst oceans of raw fish and seaweed, cheering him on as he grew larger, hungrier, questing for the glory of complete domination of so many California rolls! Tears were shed in his defeat, only to be replaced with a steely determination. Sushi Cat, I give you my word that your honeymoon will be the best ever! And my word, to paraphrase Beau Bridges from the 1996 hit Jerry Maguire, “It’s as strong as oak.”
Finally, after gallons (or, for our friends to the north, liters) of blood, sweat and tears were poured out, I was victorious! Sushi Cat’s honeymoon was saved! The volcano’s flow of lava had been stemmed! Sweet glory of glories, I had ensured Sushi Cat would live to have a long, joyous life with his love!
I guess what I’m saying is, don’t be angry, loyal readers. Be proud. Be proud that you stuck by your MoB man as he was off, fighting the good fight, helping out a cat that desperately needed it.
And now, you can see me strolling up the dusty lane leading to the metaphorical farmhouse, ready to be with you all once more.
And if you still have to be angry, blame Sushi Cat. If you can.