So, I’ve noticed that there are several celebrities out there who have started sporting the “moostache”. There was Brad Pitt, who was probably most noticed for having it, and then there were other celebs, such as Ashton Kutcher and Jack Black, who tried it out. I had my own opinions about the mustache, but I thought I’d reserve those until I actually gave it a GO myself. While I was shaving I just decided to quit on it part way in and see what it was like. How creepy is that right?! I immediately had the urge to jump online and look up unmarked vans, tricycles, and bags of candy.
After losing some time in Kelley Blue Book I realized that maybe this wasn’t the direction I wanted to let MY moostache take me. No, my moostache had other plans for me. Lead the way moostache! These new plans included an old VHS camera and a lonely blonde named Carmella, or Sweet Caramel, depending on where you met her. That’s right, this ‘stache was headed for porn!
… … … WTF?! Where is this thing leading me?? Wait! THIS is why we don’t sport mustaches anymore, ’cause the only people that wear them nowadays are pedophiles and porn stars! I know Hollywood can get away with some trends that even they shouldn’t try, but PLEASE do not let this trickle down into mainstream. I saw my dad trying it… man, did that creep me out! Let’s let that fad die.